I went to a photo shoot recently and boy I was nervous. I don’t really know why, because I’ve worked with this photographer for a very long time and she’s an absolute dream. But there you have it, I was anxious, unsure and really scatty.
I had planned my escape route from home before the school run. I washed my hair the night before and painted my nails and shaved my legs (why?????!!!). I had all of my outfits planned and had been thinking about this for days. My bag was packed full of props, mala beads, tarot cards, journals, shoes, belts, earrings, make up, brushes, a bed spread, shawls.....you name it. I knew pretty much what I wanted and had rehearsed asking specifically for one shot or another.
But I was still nervous. This is really a feeling I do really not enjoy. It takes awaiting my clarity of thought, my focus, my easy breathing and the steady pace that I usually move at.
This is quite unusual for me. I’m generally grounded and thoughtful about what is ahead of me. And I’m not gonna lie, I’m not great with transitions and this one had me feeling jangl.
But you know what?! I had a really great time. Of course I did. This particular photographer is fun, I know her really really well, she is incredibly talented and really knows her stuff. I felt completely at ease in her company. And she really helped me focus on what was going to look good and what wasn’t really needed.
I did in fact, end up using most of the stuff that I took (to my surprise). And even with all of the changes of costume and the setting up of various poses and backdrops, this was a hugely enjoyable and creative process.
Having recently turned 50, I’m experiencing the need to overhaul myself. I have known this is going to happen for a really long time now. Throughout most of my 40s I’ve got messages from the universe about this change in my identity after I went through the menopause. And here I am on the other side of the menopause and rather gingerly changing my life in every aspect of it.
I have to say and it’s not always easy and it often doesn‘t really feel like I know what I’m doing. But I am being brave, I am being creative and I am being totally true to myself.
So if you find yourself on the edge of a transition, my advice to you would be take your time, remember who you are and try not to be afraid. You can do it. Get support, ask for help and move forward by putting 1 foot in front of another. You’ll get there. I am getting closer to a really big goal that seemed so far away by taking it one step at a time. Oh and I’m even planning just a little bit more than I used to.
Prayers, visions and wishes are all so important in achieving your dreams but you have to act as well.
Go well and have courage.
Much love,
Rachel ✨💚✨